Thursday, November 23, 2006

Thanksgiving of Yesterday

So 10 years ago when I was dating the wannabe Chicano militant (who now looks like he's a bonafide militant), we went to see my favorite band Ozomatli. Actually, we were there to see Aztlan Underground, and Ozo was still just opening for them on this night, which happened to be the night before Thanksgiving. So the gig was in an old warehouse somewhere near downtown LA and later it got raided by la jura(police). Between sets, an artsy fartsy militant Chicana put on a slide show which was meant to compare the conflict in Chiapas with the actual events of the original Thanksgiving. At the end of a very moving tirade about the devils of government enslaving and murdering indigenous peoples, Artsy Fartsy Chicana screamed into the mic, "You are the indigenous turkey! You are the meat being feasted upon by the oppressor!" She chanted this a few times trying to get the crowd to chant as well, and most of the time this type of crowd would happily follow along. After repeating herself a few times, one big cholo in the crowd yelled back, "Nah! Fuck it! I want TURKEY!!!" After this everyone followed Big Cholo in chanting "Turkey...turkey" and that was the end of Artsy Fartsy Chicana's protest, at least on that night.

So Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!! This indigenous turkey is about to start cooking a la Martha Stewart.

Sunday, November 19, 2006

Why California ROCKS!

It's the week of Thanksgiving and it's 90 degrees out.
LOVE IT!!!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Priscilla

Yesterday, one of my pts passed away. She was one of the sweetest kids I've ever taken care of. Lately I'd started to look at her and feel really sad that she would never be able to do the stuff that other teens would experience. For all the dumb things I did as a kid, I'm thankful that I had the chance to do them even though I cringe at them now. Pris yearned for those experiences, but was too sick to act her age. Maybe now when teenagers are getting on my nerves at the movies or the mall, I'll be able to appreciate their youth and vitality, at least for a while until they really annoy me.

P wrote letters to her friends, sisters, and the nurses before she died. It reminded me of a scrapbook Vanessa Reyes made for her daughter. She and her husband wrote letters to their daughter for certain milestones, first day of school, first boyfriend, wedding day, birth of her child, etc. The letters are meant to be opened only if either or both had passed away. I think it is important to let people know how you feel about them every day (ok, maybe not those you loathe). But sometimes it's difficult to get those really mushy feelings out in person. We should all give it a try sometime.

So this year I'm taking away these two things from the pts I've lost. From Jess, telling people what you like about them as the thought strikes you, and from Priscilla, putting your thoughts into writing before it's too late.

I apologize if I get all mushy whenever someone dies, but this is basically my journal. I'm around more death than the average person and it sort of skews my thinking.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Depression

I was having a very lovely day today. We threw a baby shower for our friend, first baby of the bunch. I was surrounded by friends, the place was very festive, we were having fun playing Baby Bingo. Here's where my blissful day came to a screeching halt. My friend's mother said she wanted offer me her condolences. Thinking she had me confused with someone else, I gave her a puzzled look. She went on to say that my ex (the last one, who shortly before breaking up with me had been shopping for an engagement ring) had gotten married.

Being the trooper that I am, I put on a cheery face and told her that thankfully I had dodged that bullet. I really thought I was ok. But then I went into the bathroom and almost puked. I tend to become nauseated when I have a surge of strong emotion. That very reaction, in fact, is to blame for why said ex broke up with me. When we had first started dating, we ran into another of my exes, "the love of my life." Same reaction, nausea, and not from disgust. Well P said, 2 years and several discussions about "the future" later, that he could never get the sight of my reaction to another man out of his head. He said he knew that he could never cause such a reaction in me. Obviously he was wrong.

I managed to get through the day and an uncomfortable ride home with my mom without losing it. But once home, the floodgates opened. To add to the misery, I had to come to work at 10pm, where someone promptly asked me what was wrong and why were my eyes so red and puffy. There went the floodgates again.

Just when I thought I was ok with being a spinster, it all goes horribly wrong.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

My Halloween


So this was the first Halloween I dressed up since college. I was supposed to be Elphaba Thropp, but I didn't have time to put on my makeup after sitting in traffic for close to 2 hours to get to my sister's house. Damn 60 fwy.

Anyway, here's my costume. I seriously could not have found a more covered up costume, which is good because fall has finally come to SoCal and last night was a bit nippy.